Last week was Season 1 and a couple months ago was Season 3. And now, I give you, Everything Tracy Jordan Said in season 2 of 30 Rock.
These are submitted without context, which some people seem to like and others, not so much. There’s a big internet out there, though, so if you don’t like it, I’m sure there’s something else for you.
Episode 1
-Yo, Ken, I’m’a use this whole the kitchen area as my bathroom, spread the word.

-She froze my credit cards, Liz Lemon, and she got custody of Griz. Can I keep my cockatiel in your office?
-Pop. What? I’m not apologizing, ‘cuz for once in my life I haven’t done anything wrong. How many years have you known me, Liz Lemon?
-So you know I like to minister to transvestite prostitutes.
-So Labor Day weekend I see this young she-dude at the dumpster by the 40/40. I pull over and I say you don’t have to live your life like this. You can be a freaky-deaky and do data entry. What about court reporting? Believe in yourself.
-So as I reach in the trash and pull this dude out, a paparazzo jumps out and takes a picture of me.
-Whose gonna do my banking? Whose gonna write my blogs? Whose gonna do the cooking on Taco Wednesdays?
-So he’s like my office wife?
-Kenneth Parcell, would you take this ring…and sell it in the Jewish part of midtown and use the money to get us a Nintendo Wii?
-I couldn’t sleep at all last night. Angie kept my Sharper Image white noise aroma therapy machine. She knows I can’t sleep without the sound of ocean and the smell of bacon.
-I’m not doing any of that.
-Great compromise, office wife.
-Liz Lemon, I need you to go my and pretend you’re doing a survey for the Radford Group and then ask my wife if she’s sleeping with DL Hugley.
-JS!
-What’s up? Liz Lemon, me and this dude used to do stand up together. Remember the night we had the threeway with Elaine Boosler, haha?
-Oh yeah, you know what? I think that was a mirror.
-JS, this is my Kenneth.
-Mad at you, Ken, I seen the way you was looking at Seinfeld. You used to look at me like that. What, am I not a big enough star for you anymore?
-Oh no! Did a Korean person die?
-Don’t do it, Liz Lemon. I know what me and Kenneth have looks perfect on the outside, but it’s work, damn it. It’s work.
Episode 2
-Yo, Ken. Angie and Griz is coming by to drop some of my stuff off.
-Yeah, but I want her to know that I’m having a good time on my own, so you should go get us some party hats. The pointy kind.
-No, cuz things have been said that cannot be taken back. She called my vanity license plate inscrutable! ICU81MI. Hilarious! Angie is in the past like Dracula and broadcast television.
-What, who?! That guy Mike that redid our driveway?… Nah, whatever. She should find someone new. Doesn’t bother me!
-Oh.. Check this out. My key to the city of Gary, Indiana. Mm. Look at this, my gold record from that novelty party song. ‘Werewolf Bar Mitzvah, spooky scary. Boys becoming men, men becoming wolves.’
-Yeah, I miss you, Griz.
-Hey, Ken!
-I only got 11-12 hour sleep last night. I got something on my mind grapes I need to talk to you about.
-I saw you hitting on Angie the other day. Seeing you with her. It opened my eyes.
-Yeah. All those years fooling around wasn’t fair to her. So you gotta make it fair! I want you to go to my house and make love to my wife, Ken.
-My home address is in the GPS under ‘Da Crib ‘cuz we live on Dacrib Avenue. Now you go to Angie…And you make sure you pleasure her.
-What have I done? Kenneth should be back by now. What’s going on over at my house? Ugh. No. No. Eww. I gotta stop this.
-I’m gonna kill you, Kenneth the page.
-It was a gesture, Angie. I’m saying I’m sorry.
-But, baby.
-What do you want? I’m willing to try anything.
-Alright. If that’s what it takes. If that’s what it takes.
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